Hey Lady, I Heard You Like Jokes…

hey lady!

Jokes are skeleton keys to manipulating a multitude of situations. People use them to ease awkward or uncomfortable conversations or experiences. Marketers use them to capture customer attention. Even someone as serious as the President uses jokes (even if it is poorly executed). Opportunities for jokes are everywhere, so it makes sense that they are abundant.

I personally cringe to see a good sexual joke go neglected. Luckily, my friends find this wildly entertaining as opposed to obnoxious (which is probably a more accurate description). In fact, one of my friends and I enjoy this pastime so much that we developed the “Hey Lady/Hey Pal” game. The rules are simple. The joke must be unexpected, sexual in nature, and read or spoken in a typical Boston accent. The basic structure looks like this:

“Hey lady/pal, I heard you like _______. Well, I got your _________ RIGHT HERE! Yeah!” 

Here is a real life example for better understanding:

Friend texts: “I’m getting dentisted right now.” (translation: I am at the dentist’s office for a routine teeth cleaning)

My response: “Hey lady, I heard you like going to the dentist. Well, I got your palette expander RIGHT HERE! Yeah!”

One more to demonstrate the female version, and because I can’t control myself:

Friend sends me a picture of a job site he is working at doing manly lumberjack stuff 

Me: “Hey pal, I heard you like landscaping. Well, I’ve got a field you can plow RIGHT HERE! Yeah!”

Once the joke war has commenced, the first one to respond with anything other than a hey lady/pal joke loses.What kind of ridiculous games do you and your friends play?

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About becca3416

I am a twenty-something year old southern ballerina turned business student. While I graduated college with a degree in Marketing, I currently work in Safety for an oil field company. Sadly, I do not even own a hard hat. Up until this point, I have followed the path set out for me that was promised to lead me to success. What I did not do, was take the time to figure out what my definition of success is. Having lived in Louisiana my entire life, I am utterly fixated on my goal of eventually moving somewhere new (preferably far) while pursuing a career in writing and/or social media marketing. I believe one of my callings is making people laugh. Although I think I can play the drums, I cannot and will not sing in front of humans. Don’t ask.

17 thoughts on “Hey Lady, I Heard You Like Jokes…

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  3. Here’s the worst line I’ve ever heard: “My face will be leaving in a quarter of an hour, I’d like you to be on it.”

    The only fun game I play is with my husband. I found this GI Joe doll head near the dumpster (I know….) and for years we would take turns hiding it in things. I once froze it in an ice cube and served it in my husband’s ice tea. He buried it deep in my face cream jar and I didn’t find it for months. We called it “The Head”. Our running joke was, “Where is The Head now?”

    Sadly, The Head disappeared and we miss him.

      • Nice! Hope LA is getting sunny. The sun is out here and I’m taking Sweet Face for a long walk after work. That, my dear Becca, is the best life has to offer. A long walk with a dear friend and, of course, a good clean dirty joke which, I’ve got right here! HF

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