This past weekend was the Superbowl, but instead I went bear hunting. You read that correctly. I don’t have pictures to prove it, and I wasn’t actually hunting. You game wardens out there can calm down. So while you were watching Beyonce knock out the power with her bootyliciousness and extensions, I was searching for Winnie The Pooh. How do you feel about that?
Bear watching and tractors. Fuck yeah. Take that Superbowl.
I can’t get into detail about what happened to me out in those woods, but not because I did anything illegal. The real reason I can not properly tell you about my excursion is because there is something amiss with my blog. While attempting to wow you with a post about my Bear Grylls (no name-pun intended) antics, my blog started acting… funny. And not the normal kind of hilarious funny.
For example:
When I attempted to click the “New Post” tab, a java script error popped up on my screen that said, “Oh, finally attempting a post? Haha, nope,” and my whole browser shut down on its own. I wasn’t even touching the mouse.
On my second attempt, as I tried to navigate back to the WordPress homepage, I kept getting redirected to the Creative Writing for Dummies Cheat Sheet. I knew there was something funky in the water at this point.
As a true test, I decided I would try to answer some comments that were being neglected. When I guided my cursor over the reply box, the faded default message, “Enter your comment here…” no longer existed. In its place was, “Peanut butter jelly time baby cakes…”. When I tried to erase it and type my own message, everything came out in Webdings font. This is when I opened the Jim Beam and closed the lap top.
I’m befuddled as to what has been happening to my blog. It took seventeen battles with my dashboard just to bang out this cry for help post for today. Have any of you been experiencing shenanigans on your blogs? Is WordPress just playing an early April fools joke on me, or is there something bigger at work here? Any insight is appreci B============D—–
What the fu ( . )( . ) ( . )( . ) ( . )( . )
HELP!
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Because of your gaming background I am perfectly at ease with an ‘armed to the teeeth’ Becca. Bears beware.
I have a certain set of skills…
Nothing weird has happened to me other than I haven’t been getting very many search engine hits lately. Although, today I got 90 people looking for pictures of “garbage truck.” The next closest was 3 people looking for “cranberry pants men.” The sad thing is I remember writing about men who wear cranberry colored pants and they actually were in the right place.
Better than “penisless lady boy”. I never wrote a post about that, so I hope people weren’t just looking for me. For the record, I am penisless, but I am not a lady boy.
Recording this information into my portable notebook now.
I have no words of encouragement and no way to help you. But I will say I enjoyed the B=====D and the (.)(.)… So maybe keep doing that? You’re on your way to a more classy kind of porn.
Emotiporn.
I should get with a programmer and get an App out for that. Mega bucks.
MEGA MILLIONS at least.. However something tells me a horny 14 year old programming wizard already beat you to it.
Something told me that way before I even typed it, but I do what I want.
YOU REBEL!
Blimey, Becca.
I’m seeing orange spots!
Tell me, though, before the browser closed, did you notice anything else unusual? A strange, orange-coloured speech bubble, perhaps? I see them on my blog occasionally when I reply to comments there… not before I reply, but after.
Something is amiss…
You see the orange spots too?!?! Thank god, I thought I was losing my shit!
I’ve already liked your facebook page.
I suspect WP is just jealous that you went looking for Winnie-the-Pooh and it was stuck at home watching the Superbowl.
Most people who are diligent enough to check the tags will have already liked my FB page. So I guess that wasn’t very intelligent of me.
Unless you want us to unlike the page so we can then like it again?
Sounds like a good idea, but I am not sure that would help me ultimately. Thanks though! I am happy to know you would be willing
.
WordPress folks are busy little bees, aren’t they? They always seem to be tinkering with something. I had to email this week about not showing up in people’s Reader!I don’t know why I’m not getting 10,000 hits a day now…
WordPress needs to slow their roll!
I had something similar happen a while back – I took the proactive approach of despairing and hoping things changed without my action.
How nonchalant of you. I like the approach.
I find it’s best with computer issues to be cool and show you don’t need them.
I think government is trying to suppress your right to be awesome, Becca.
Who did you tick off?
Apparently the Illuminati. I won’t let them get me down!
Fight the power, Becca!
Not until I read the comments did I even realize those were emotiboobs. Six emotibobs were right in front of me and there was no recognition on my part. I am so broken!
Mike, how can I help? This is serious. We can’t let it go.
I’m a lost cause. If you really want to help, find someone who can be helped. I–I’m irreparably broken.
You are the bees knees. You don’t need to have emoti-boob detection. There. You are fixed.
Really? Just like that? You are a miracle worker! How ever can I thank you?
You just did
*walks away charmingly*
*thinks ‘wow, she really walks charmingly. What a gal. What – a – gal.’ *
I totally noticed the emoti-boobies right away. And the emoti-peni.
Is peni plural for penis?
yup.
emotiboobs. were you able to type that without laughing?
I may have smirked.
i can’t even thinking without lauging.
Emoti-boobs is a technical term. Of course I didn’t laugh.
would you laugh at emotijunk? <=====3
That’s some sharp looking junk. Now I know what you were talking about last night.
that’s funny. took me a second to get it.
Becca,
You’re too funny! I go straight to your tags now to first determine which Becca is writing today. Quite the prankster!
( + ) ( + )
Red
Red, you are a smart man! Thanks. Nice tits.
Thank you, plus size!
Triple Zs !
I think if you would have just rubbed your boobs all over your laptop, the entire problem would have gone away.
http://www.breezybooks.com/bearcamp1a.jpg
P.S. I got the bear.
My bear and your bear should get together and make baby bears.
We would have an adorable bear that would be more famous than Winnie-the-Pooh. It would have red fur and wear long johns in the forest.
I think we just came up with the premise for our children’s book. Yes?
It crossed my mind the minute I wrote it. It sounds really, really cute.
No one better steal our idea. We should explore this!
LOL! There is a “bear in long underwear” at a top named book site, but ours would be better named and so much cuter than that one.
I just checked it out. Ours would be way better. It would be a series of adventures. Think Clifford the Big red dog, but better.
So much better! I’m late for an appointment. Dashing out.Think of a name for this cutie pie bear.
Becaa, must be a sign…of what, I don’t know? It’s funny how everyone just wants to talk about boobs, isn’t it? I feel it in the air, myself. A lot of people are needing a little break. Please don’t shoot Pooh Bear.
I would never do that to Pooh. Piglet on the other hand… what can I say. I like bacon.
Becca, that is really weird! Have tried ctrl+alt+del?
If you have, then try again lifting you left foot (without the sketchers…it causes some sort of gamma ray or something) and pointing west with your right ring finger ? (apologies if you actually don’t have full set of fingers in your right hand…)
if that doesn’t work, it might be a virus, so rub a little vick vapor rub behind the screen, that usually fixes it for me.
x
I don’t even have a right hand, but thanks for reminding me. I am going to try the Vicks thing.
No problems like you discussed. But WordPress was sucking ass pretty badly on Friday as my epic post on Beyonce did not appear in my or anyone else’s reader that day. I asked them for help and they responded 3 days later with, “it’s in there now.” This happens a lot with them.
And why so small on the nips? (o)(o)
That is just wrong of them! All of that exposure… gone!
Small nips are cuter.
Perhaps, but yours look saggy. Not yours yours, but the ones you typed.
Should get them lifted so they look like these (*)(*) (^)(^)
( * )Y( * ) – I just gave them implants AND a lift. Look at that cleavage!!
Spank bank filled…
Lol ew.
If you’re like the woman in my office, you’ll expect me to fix this. Apparently, the fact that I work as a web developer means that I can fix every little problem that happens to the computer.
“It isn’t saving where I tell it to! This computer doesn’t work right!”
“Did you try turning it off and then back on again?”
“I have deadlines! I can’t be fooling around doing that!”
Since I’m new, I don’t want to go off on her, but I’m very close to finding out just how important she is here, and then reacting accordingly.
I hope she is just a silly administrative assistant like me. Then you can tell her to go make you coffee. Like they tell me. SIGH.
But I don’t drink coffee!
Sandwiches are an alternative apparently . SIGH AGAIN.
You should work in a smaller office Becca. The president brings me coffee! Or would… if I liked coffee…
How do you not like coffee you alien!!
Dang, I was trying to keep Area 51 a secret!! Way to blow my cover Becca…
*puts on sunglasses* Just look at this pretty pretty pen I have… *flash*
BOOOOOBS!!! Boobs, boobs, boobs! Now I have to go back and read the rest.
Yes, the post lived up to all the boobage. I have no idea how to solve your problem though. Maybe try….boobs? Sorry. Nothing.
Boobs- the universal answer to everything. It makes ever more sense than 42.
Damn, your eye just went straight down to the bottom where the boobies where, didn’t they? Impressive.
Wheres Waldo should have been a nice pair of boobs… Would’ve been way way way easier.
Or a mohawk.
Punk Waldo would have.
Maybe it’s the illuminati….
Well, Beyonce has been everywhere lately, and we all know she is the leader of the Illuminati.
Ha, Peanut Butter Jelly Time! Also, you made boob emoticons. Hee. I’m glad I’m not the only one having difficulty with an attitudinal WP. Every time I try to write a new post, I don’t get Webdings but every word just comes out as DUH no matter what keys I hit. It’s really very frustrating so I feel your pain. And pass those Pixy Stix.
I’m a sharer. Here, have a whole bag.
Has someone been doing pixie stix again?
I plead the fifth.
Becca, a fairly serious issue with Java has been noted by Firefox, and MS. I’ll see if I can get the links for you. If you can, disable Java, immediately.
Victoria
Here ya go. Hope this helps.
http://www.informationweek.com/security/vulnerabilities/oracle-issues-emergency-java-security-up/240147724
Appreciate the trouble Victoria!
Oh man, everyone is so helpful and tech savvy today. Thanks Victoria, but don’t fret too much. This post is fictitious and more about finding blame for my lack of posting lately.
haha! I thought so, but wanted to have it Mommy-Tight, ya know?
Much Love.
You have it on lock down ma’am. I like you!
Glad you’re back.
Thank you! As am I. Truly.
I almost blew coffee all over my keyboard, again, over “lock down”.
I haven’t had a problem except with coming up with something to write about. Nothing with formatting though. Nothing like you’re talking about. That’s bizarre, Becca.
It IS bizarre. Peanut ButterPeanut ButterPeanut Butter
Shit. Sorry. See what I am dealing with here?!
Could it be that one of the chain blogging awards you accepted was really a virus?
I haven’t accepted any awards in a while. I may address the person who “gives” me the award and answer a few questions, but I stopped putting any buttons or anything on my sidebar as far as “awards” go. That can’t be it, but good looking out!
Yes, I’m innocent!
Maddie is ALWAYS innocent even when she is not. I said so.
That’s right!
I’ve actually been having alot of trouble with wordpress pages not wanting to load. I know that it couldn’t be my 24 yr old pc that I use because I’m to lazy to walk over to my mac.
Hey you should get a bumper sticker, now, that says, “Bear Hunter”.
I mean, you’ve earned it.
Yesterday, I saw a massive chevy truck, all jacked up with mudders, and on the center of the back glass it had a rather large sticker that said, “Squirrel Hunter”.
I found that perplexing. I mean, why make a big deal about that. That would be almost like having a bumper sticker that said something like, “Mayonnaise Lover”. Or something like that.
But “Bear Hunter”, somehow would be different.
HA! I think I’d rather have the bumper sticker “Mayonnaise Lover” just to confuse people and possibly creep them out. You are probably right though, I should stick with “Bear Hunter”. It will make me seem even more intimidating than I already am.
Sounds like not-too-subtle messages from the internet Gods, Becca. Weird…
The internet gods are not forces to be reckoned with. Cathy, pray for me.
Sending intercession, Sista!
Ouch!
Just tested mine (through Interet Explorer) and it seemed to work.
Try disabling any add-ons in your browser and see if that fixes it. A browser crash is usually related to your machine, and not the outside world.
Hint: I made up this entire post.
I use WordPress as a “backup” to my main site on Blogger. This morning WP worked just fine, but I had some formatting issues with Blogger. My question is this: Did you break Blogger because you got pissed at WP?
Signed,
A Blogging Dumbass Who Hunts Moose Not Bears (or squirrels)
If you hunted squirrels I was going to be really upset.
I do not use Blogger at all. It’s all WordPress. It’s almost like my blog is coming to life and fighting me for control…